Reasons to go to the ER:

Meet your friends and neighbors in triage

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Chest pain

Back pain

Neck pain

Pain in the behind

Nausea, vomiting, diarrhea

Give us some constirpation

Shortness of breath, no breath

Asthma, inhaler

Near drowning

Too much drugs, OD

Need drugs, for pain or recreation

Motor vehicle accident

Bicycle accident

Motorcycle accident

ATV accident

Rash, road rash

Spider bite, cat bite

Dog bite, mosquito bite

Snake bite, scorpion bite

Falls, winter, spring, summer

Toothache, double vision

Female problems

Male problems

Email problems

No internet connection

Four hour erection.

If you are admitted | What I learned working in an ER